Just Another Day At The Jackson-Chase Household
by Ramonks33
Summary: Crack-fic! Post Blood of Olympus. When Percy is left alone at the house with no food, he decides to try to cook by himself. Oh, Jupiter, help us. Rated T for language


_Just Another Day At the Jackson-Chase Household_

**_A/N: Just a dumb crack-fic that popped into my head while I was watching Masterchef Junior. Enjoy!_**

One day, Percy Jackson decided to cook.

It didn't go well.

It was about two in the afternoon in their New York apartment. The sun was shining, the clouds missing from the sky, and Percy Jackson's stomach grumbling too loudly. If Annabeth was home, she would've swatted him affectionately and tell him to get up and warm a Hot Pocket. And when he would fail to do so about five minutes ago, she would bring him a Hot Pocket with a smile, and kiss his forehead, calling him an idiot. And he would merely agree, because he knows it's true. Compared to her, he's a blunt ended idiot. But this one time, Annabeth wasn't home. She was up in Olympus, helping Athena with something boring he was half listening to. He forgot to ask her if there was anything to eat in the fridge before she left, and when he got up around two hours to check if there was any. When greeted with a half empty carton of milk and a block of moldy cheese, he assumed there wasn't. He is hungry, though, and damnit, he is Perseus friggin Jackson, he is not going to let the lack of Annabeth's presence damn him now. He's faced Tartarus, the God of The Underworld several times, and saved the entire world two times! He is not going to sit around and cry.

So, finally deciding to do something, he sorts through their bedroom drawers, trying to find the emergency Lotus credit card Annabeth had stolen when the Gods finally went through with their promises and destroyed the Lotus Hotel in Las Vegas. Finding the bright green card, he pulls a dark t-shirt on and a pair of board shorts that weren't ripped, and headed down to the Eastside Grocery. That was the one Annabeth went to, anyway.  
>Heading inside the store, he hesitantly picks up a basket, staring at the chaotic store. What does Annabeth even pick up while she's here? Would this card even work? He shakes his head, trying to keep the doubting thought out of his head. Damnit, he is a demigod! A mortal grocery store is not going to stop him!<p>

Half an hour later, Percy has green peppers, red peppers, tomato sauce, salt and pepper, mozzarella cheese, and pre-made dough. And about two medium sized sticks of pepperoni. Probably more then he needs, but he likes pepperoni on his pizza. Along with those ingredients, he has a few soft drinks, and some snacks. Thank goodness the Lotus Card works, he thinks to himself as the uninterested cashier hands him the card, because that would've cost a lot, he thinks. Hell, he's never been that good with math, anyway.

Carrying the paper bags home (Annabeth insists that it's better for the environment), he looks around as he sets the groceries on the counter. He stares at the selection, proud of himself, before realizing he didn't even remember the layering of the pizza. Was it sauce first? Or cheese? Or was it cheese then sauce? Damnit, what was it? He picks up the phone and calls Nico, who could probably help him, right? Percy reasons it was because Nico was Italian, and he could probably convince him and Will to come down to their apartment and help him.

"Nico?"

"What, Jackson?"

"Can you help me make a pizza?"

"..."

"Nico-ooo-ooo! IT'S IMPORTANT!"

"..."

"I'M HUNGRY! And you can bring Will if you want."

"...I'm kind of busy right now, Jackson."

"What do you mean?"

"Sorry, Jackson."

Percy was left holding the phone to a silent line. Harrumphing in response, he quickly dials Jason's number, and within minutes, he has Jason on his way to the apartment. Percy suspects Nico called them right before Percy did, to warn them him that Percy would call, but Jason, being the great friend he is, is quickly on his way to the apartment. And about ten minutes later, Jason is standing alongside his friend, wearing one of Piper's aprons that had hearts all over it. They stare down at the counter, both of them scratching their scalps.

"Well, we should probably put sauce on it, first..." Jason says after a while. Picking up the jar of tomato sauce, he twists a little too hard, tomato sauce flies out of the jar, slopping Jason in the face. Percy tries not to laugh as Jason, unamused, wipes the sauce off his face with a napkin, and carefully spreads it over the already open pre-made dough.

"No, we need more then that!"

"Percy, that's enough for a pizza."

"Dude, that's a tiny spoonful. We need to put a lot more then that." Percy takes the spoon and the jar from Jason and quickly pours about two spoonfuls onto the pizza. And then some more. And more. Jason quickly grabs the jar from his friend and twists the lid back on hastily, as they stare at the saucy pizza pie on the counter. If that took that long, they wondered how long it would take to make the entire goddamn pizza.

About two hours later, Percy and Jason are panicking, running around the apartment. The fire alarm had gone off, with dark smoke pouring out of the oven. Jason was trying to turn the goddamn thing off, while Percy had summoned water from the faucet and it was currently spraying the oven like no tomorrow. When the smoke and water cleared up, they were left with a gigantic mess that was formerly Percy's kitchen. The pizza had burned to a soggy stiff piece of bread, soaked with water. It was honestly disgusting. Percy and Jason stared at the burned smoking mess, both cringing.

"Annabeth is going to kill us."

"She'll kill you, Percy. Not me."

"If I go down, you're going down with me, Superman."

"Point taken."

And with the worst timing, Annabeth Chase walks into the kitchen, looking tired after a long day in Olympus, to find her boyfriend and her best friend's boyfriend standing in the kitchen, covered in soot, soaked to the bone. There's an awkward tense silence, as Annabeth takes in the scene, before she begins to laugh. Her hair falls into her face, laughing like she hasn't laughed in awhile. Her gut begins to hurt as tears run down from her face, as Jason and Percy nervously chuckle in response, confused and frankly, relieved. When she finally calms down, she shakes her head and calls Piper on her cellphone, explaining the situation, and calling them idiotic stupid morons, but they were _their _idiotic stupid morons. That calmed Percy's slight hurt that arose when she called him, and even more so when she walks over, flicks a small piece of pepper out of his hair and kisses his cheek, chuckling.

Half an hour later, the apartment was put back together, all traces of the mess gone. Jason, wearing a new pair of glasses because his had been broken during the chaos, was cuddling with Piper on the couch, giggling as they watched the most recent Marvel movie that Annabeth had gotten early thanks to special godly connections. Herself and Percy were munching on the last of the delivered, and thankfully not burned, pizza from Dominos. Just another day at the Jackson-Chase household.


End file.
